This past year (2007) God has worked amazingly in my life. I have grown by leaps and bounds in my walk with Him. I praise God that I am not who I was a year ago.
That being said I start this new year knowing that this is going to be a tremendous year for what God is going to do through me. I believe this because of the journey He has taken me through in the last couple of months. He has slowly and steadily broken me down and helped me surrender so much of myself to His will. For the first time in my life I feel I can honestly say that He is the center of my daily life. When I wake up in the morning, He is the first thing I think about.
For the past 2 months I have been struggling, praying, and yearning to be filled with the power of the Holy Spirit so that I can actually be effective in service to Him. I have been so ineffective on my own up to this point. I am so fed up and frustrated with trying and failing as a missionary for Him. Last year God helped me to realize that I was failing because I was doing it from my power and not His. This started the journey of self-searching and surrender that led me through complete frustration and feeling like this quest would never end.
Then a couple of days ago (January 8th) while I was praying and reading a book called “They Found the Secret“,God revealed something to me. I was reading the chapter on W. Ian Thomas and God showed me through the words of that great man of faith that He had already given me the Holy Spirit, I just had to believe Him and choose to live in the power that I already had at work within me.
I got down on my knees and prayed to God, “Jesus, I believe that you have given me your Holy Spirit and I choose here, today, to walk from here on out in your power and not mine. Tomorrow, may you speak and act through me in what I do. Help me to always be an example of the triumph we have in Christ Jesus”.
I claimed 2 Corinthians 2:14, “But thanks be unto God, who always leads us in triumph in Christ, and makes manifest through us the savor of his knowledge in every place. “
For me it was the act of faith that I was lacking previously. I had to accept this fact unwaveringly and step out with it. After I prayed this prayer I didn’t feel anything differently. I just believed that something had changed.
The next morning I woke up and had my daily quiet time, like usual. There was no great sense of closeness or feeling of power. But, as I went to work I believed that I was now filled with the power of God. I found myself taking risks I normally would have done and inviting people to our weekly bible study. And there did seem to be something different in the responses I got. No one came to the bible study the next night. But genuiene interest was expressed, and one person mentioned the next day that she regretted not going.
I know that this is just the beginning of what God will do if I continue to fully yield to Him and let Him work through me. If I stop trying to do it myself, I believe He can and will use me to do great things for His kingdom this year. I will keep you updated on what He does!
Praise and glory to Jesus Christ, the author and finisher of our faith!
January 13, 2008 at 1:33 am
Be prepared for God to do nothing in your life, too. He is more concerned with your loving Him than in your being used by Him. It’s easy to love being used, but then, being used becomes an idol and a mini-god. So focus simply on knowing Jesus. That’s all that matters anyway.
January 13, 2008 at 11:29 pm
Interesting thought. Thanks for your perspective. I will strive to seek Jesus’ face daily. The last thing I want is for being used by Him to become an obstacle and my fellowship with Him. However, I do not believe that we are called to be ineffective. He has given us the power of the Holy Spirit so that we can be bold witnesses and proclaim His name in season and out of season to all who will listen.
God has guided the spiritual journey I have been on. He has taken me through the valleys of fruitlessness because He wants to show what He can do through my life fully yielded to Him. He has given me the vision and promise of what He wants to do through me already. If I were to turn to the word of God I can list countless places where we are called to be victorious in service to Jesus:
“For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.” ~ Phil 4:13
“No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.” ~ Rom 8:37
“For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” ~ Eph 2:10
“The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.” ~ James 5:16
“Paul and Barnabas went to the Jewish synagogue and preached with such power that a great number of both Jews and Greeks became believers.” ~ Acts 14:1
“But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you. And you will be my witnesses, telling people about me everywhere—in Jerusalem, throughout Judea, in Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” ~ Acts 1:8
I could go on and on, but the point is I feel we are called to be effective for Jesus. The point is not that I will be effective by my actions, but that the Holy Spirit will work through me proportionally to the amount that I am yielded to Him. I do believe that if we are not being used by Him as effective witnesses, we need to stop and asses what is wrong in our life. What are we focusing on instead of Jesus?
I will pray that God protects me from placing my passion for souls to be won for His kingdom over my desire for Him. Thank you for your concern. I would appreciate your prayers.
“But thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumph in Christ, and manifests through us the sweet aroma of the knowledge of Him in every place” ~ 2 Corr 2:14
January 14, 2008 at 1:28 am
As long as Phlippians 3:8 stays upper most, you’ll be ok! And remember, there are seasons of use. Job was taken out for awhile!